Wednesday, August 7, 2013
SUCCESS!
Export/Import - The Millers Lovestory blog is now on www.awallflowerinbloom.com
Time to start fresh! I am still keeping this blog, but for now my main one is A Wallflower in Bloom. Let the blogging begin!
Inspired
I have created a new domain for a new blog. I do not have it set up yet, but I am working on it. I just purchased the domain last night - www.awallflowerinbloom.com
I have been inspired to document my life via blog and videos. I know I have been doing this already with this blog and I will transfer all of my posts from here to my new one.
Once I get it up and running I will start blogging more about the positive in my life. I have a wonderful husband, a beautiful son and another baby on the way.
No more will I let people's judgements get the best of me. I am me. I will learn from my mistakes, grow from them and become a better person.
A friend emailed me and said this - "it's not the mistakes that define you, it's how you grow from your mistakes that mold you..." - she really opened my eyes and inspired me.
People can think what ever they want, they say I am unhappy, a bad person, etc. - I have realized it does not matter. I know I am happy. I have a wonderful husband, an amazing son and a little bundle of love on the way. I know I am a good person with a loving and caring heart.
I am pursing all my goals with my husband supporting me 150%. My family is my everything. They matter most in my life.
My new blog will be nothing but positive and happy posts. It'll be my journey with a new mindset.
Negative Jesse has left the building and no longer will this wallflower stay in the corner. It is my time to bloom.
xoxo
I have been inspired to document my life via blog and videos. I know I have been doing this already with this blog and I will transfer all of my posts from here to my new one.
Once I get it up and running I will start blogging more about the positive in my life. I have a wonderful husband, a beautiful son and another baby on the way.
No more will I let people's judgements get the best of me. I am me. I will learn from my mistakes, grow from them and become a better person.
A friend emailed me and said this - "it's not the mistakes that define you, it's how you grow from your mistakes that mold you..." - she really opened my eyes and inspired me.
People can think what ever they want, they say I am unhappy, a bad person, etc. - I have realized it does not matter. I know I am happy. I have a wonderful husband, an amazing son and a little bundle of love on the way. I know I am a good person with a loving and caring heart.
I am pursing all my goals with my husband supporting me 150%. My family is my everything. They matter most in my life.
My new blog will be nothing but positive and happy posts. It'll be my journey with a new mindset.
Negative Jesse has left the building and no longer will this wallflower stay in the corner. It is my time to bloom.
xoxo
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
The Future
This Thursday we find out how baby is doing and I will be 18 weeks pregnant. Hopefully baby cooperates and will let us see what is between the legs!
Hubby and I decided on the names for a boy and a girl -
Benjamin Bruce Miller
Emilia Danielle Nioko Miller
We are so excited to find out if JJ is having a little sister or little brother. He is going to be the best big brother ever. I can feel it, and I can tell because has such a kind and good soul. He is the sweetest boy.
I look forward to our family of three becoming a family of four, starting and finishing grad school, graduating with a masters degree, losing weight and getting into the best shape of my life and finding peace with myself. I look forward to having my family back together again as a whole. I look forward to pursuing my ultimate goal ;)
There is so much to look forward to in life and I am looking forward to overcoming all the challenges that will come my way. I have my husband and my babies and they are my motivation to move forward with my head held up high.
xoxo
Hubby and I decided on the names for a boy and a girl -
Benjamin Bruce Miller
Emilia Danielle Nioko Miller
We are so excited to find out if JJ is having a little sister or little brother. He is going to be the best big brother ever. I can feel it, and I can tell because has such a kind and good soul. He is the sweetest boy.
I look forward to our family of three becoming a family of four, starting and finishing grad school, graduating with a masters degree, losing weight and getting into the best shape of my life and finding peace with myself. I look forward to having my family back together again as a whole. I look forward to pursuing my ultimate goal ;)
There is so much to look forward to in life and I am looking forward to overcoming all the challenges that will come my way. I have my husband and my babies and they are my motivation to move forward with my head held up high.
xoxo
JJ's 1st Pediatric Dental Appt
JJ did so well at this appointment today. He did have his first dental screening on July 5th when we had our WIC appointment. I made an official appointment not too long after. They pretty much did the same thing - brushed his teeth with fluoride and then checked his teeth. The dentist said to brush his teeth (which we do) every day.
JJ did not cry nor fuss. He is such an awesome boy. Love him to death!
xoxo
JJ did not cry nor fuss. He is such an awesome boy. Love him to death!
xoxo
Monday, August 5, 2013
Random Post
If I were still a pre-nursing student I would have my second A&P course starting today at 9a. Since I am no longer a pre-nursing student (second bachelors),
In 16 months (starting September) I will have my Masters in Public Health. I am one excited Momma!!
---------------------------------
These last few days have been emotionally exhausting. I allowed myself to over think what people thought about me and I let people's opinions/judgements get the best of me.
I own up to my mistakes and I will change for the better. I will make more mistakes and all I can do is learn from them. People will not approve of everything I do and people will dislike me and I will still be me at the end of the day.
The more I thought about what people thought about me, the more I kept putting myself down. I have decided for myself that it is high time I grow a pair and man up.
No more weak Jesse. No more caring too much about what people think and say about me. All that matters are the opinions of those that really matter to me (great advice from a good friend). No more putting myself down because of what people say.
There are more important things in my life - my babies, my husband, my parents and bro, finishing grad school, reaching my goal for my family and my happiness.
Not only did I care too much about what people thought...for too long I let people walk all over me and disrespect me because I did not want to cause any friction. I was always worried people would be angry with me and that meant putting how I felt on the back burner. Never again.
I will succeed in everything I do because I want to and I will work hard to get there.
Yesterday is in the past, today I start fresh and I will stay positive.
xoxo
In 16 months (starting September) I will have my Masters in Public Health. I am one excited Momma!!
---------------------------------
These last few days have been emotionally exhausting. I allowed myself to over think what people thought about me and I let people's opinions/judgements get the best of me.
I own up to my mistakes and I will change for the better. I will make more mistakes and all I can do is learn from them. People will not approve of everything I do and people will dislike me and I will still be me at the end of the day.
The more I thought about what people thought about me, the more I kept putting myself down. I have decided for myself that it is high time I grow a pair and man up.
No more weak Jesse. No more caring too much about what people think and say about me. All that matters are the opinions of those that really matter to me (great advice from a good friend). No more putting myself down because of what people say.
There are more important things in my life - my babies, my husband, my parents and bro, finishing grad school, reaching my goal for my family and my happiness.
Not only did I care too much about what people thought...for too long I let people walk all over me and disrespect me because I did not want to cause any friction. I was always worried people would be angry with me and that meant putting how I felt on the back burner. Never again.
I will succeed in everything I do because I want to and I will work hard to get there.
Yesterday is in the past, today I start fresh and I will stay positive.
xoxo
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Marriage and Pornography
This is an interesting topic. It came up in a conversation via text messages with a family member. I was told that it is funny that I got "worked up" over it, but I just wanted my family member to understand my point of view. But it was clearly stated by the end of the text conversation (by my family member) that I am "THAT insecure".
Here is my personal value/belief on the topic of pornography in marriage -
Everyone has insecurities and it is not funny to make fun of people because of them. Yes I have my insecurities, but they have nothing to do with me not wanting my husband to watch pornography.
When we got married I made it clear that I believe watching it individually is very disrespectful to me and to our marriage. Together, sure why not! But once you start watching it on your own for individual pleasure...it becomes disrespectful.
For some couples they enjoy it, I respect that. For others it is not okay. For my husband and I there is no pornography. I am the only woman that he should be thinking about and he is the only man for me. Hey if he wants some dirty pictures, I am more than happy to give him some (insert smile here) and vice versa. Our long distance marriage is tough and with technology today, sending each other videos and pics of each other keeps the spice alive.
So going back to what I was saying...
If my husband wanted to watch pornography then he should have not gotten married. I am blessed to have a husband that respects our marriage and respects me and my values. He has not watched any porn since we had our heart to heart. We are going on three years of being married. He is amazing. Yes, he is in Oregon and it is hard to know what goes on, but I trust him and have faith in him that he keeps his word. You just know with the one you love.
Because I do not want my husband to watch pornography DOES NOT make me "THAT insecure". It is OUR value in OUR marriage. We are committed to each other in love, trust and faithfulness.
No ones insecurities are greater than someone else's. An insecurity is an insecurity period. But it is NOT always the reason for a lot of situations. One being pornography and a significant other.
I posted in one of my Mom groups on Facebook about this conversation. The lovely mamas that did answer, believed in the same thing and some love watching it with their spouses. Every one has their own preferences. A lot of them said they are NOT insecure about themselves, they just believe porn is disrespectful in marriage. So, it is not just about being insecure.
What works for my husband and I may not work for another couple, but this works for US. We believe that it is not necessary to use in order to get it on behind closed (bedroom) doors.
xoxo
Here is my personal value/belief on the topic of pornography in marriage -
Everyone has insecurities and it is not funny to make fun of people because of them. Yes I have my insecurities, but they have nothing to do with me not wanting my husband to watch pornography.
When we got married I made it clear that I believe watching it individually is very disrespectful to me and to our marriage. Together, sure why not! But once you start watching it on your own for individual pleasure...it becomes disrespectful.
For some couples they enjoy it, I respect that. For others it is not okay. For my husband and I there is no pornography. I am the only woman that he should be thinking about and he is the only man for me. Hey if he wants some dirty pictures, I am more than happy to give him some (insert smile here) and vice versa. Our long distance marriage is tough and with technology today, sending each other videos and pics of each other keeps the spice alive.
So going back to what I was saying...
If my husband wanted to watch pornography then he should have not gotten married. I am blessed to have a husband that respects our marriage and respects me and my values. He has not watched any porn since we had our heart to heart. We are going on three years of being married. He is amazing. Yes, he is in Oregon and it is hard to know what goes on, but I trust him and have faith in him that he keeps his word. You just know with the one you love.
Because I do not want my husband to watch pornography DOES NOT make me "THAT insecure". It is OUR value in OUR marriage. We are committed to each other in love, trust and faithfulness.
No ones insecurities are greater than someone else's. An insecurity is an insecurity period. But it is NOT always the reason for a lot of situations. One being pornography and a significant other.
I posted in one of my Mom groups on Facebook about this conversation. The lovely mamas that did answer, believed in the same thing and some love watching it with their spouses. Every one has their own preferences. A lot of them said they are NOT insecure about themselves, they just believe porn is disrespectful in marriage. So, it is not just about being insecure.
What works for my husband and I may not work for another couple, but this works for US. We believe that it is not necessary to use in order to get it on behind closed (bedroom) doors.
xoxo
Thursday, August 1, 2013
17 Weeks and JJ turning 16 mos!
First off JJ turned 16 mos on 07.30.2013 -
We had a Mommy/Son date and we had a great time!
Today 08.01.2013 -
Hip hip hooray I am 17 weeks today! One week from today we will find out if we are having a boy or girl! That is if the baby cooperates and spreads the legs. Hahaha. I am super excited! Plus I cannot wait to find out how he or she is doing.
This past week has been pretty good and pretty blah. JJ turned 16 mos and hello week 17.
I've learned what family really thinks of me. One told me in a very mean way and another told me in a nice adult conversation. Either way I appreciate them for telling me and now I know what I am. I am not going to say it does not hurt. It does. The truth always hurts. All I can do is change for the better.
The one who I had a nice conversation with said that I am not used to going through these type of situations. I mean high school yah...but adulthood, nope. It is different as adults. I'd rather talk face to face as adults vs getting all the information whether it is through Facebook messages, texts or emails. I am happy this person actually sat down and told me face to face, even though it was via FaceTime. At least this person looked at me and told me straight up. It was much easier to take in.
I will cry about it, I will think about it and it will eat me up until it passes and has been forgotten.
I am owning up to it. I am sinner and I am not perfect. I make mistakes like every other human being. I am not better than anyone. I am me. I can and I will change for the better.
People's opinions of me should not matter, but it hurts. It will always hurt.
It makes it harder to deal with because I am pregnant (so my emotions and hormones are on high! I am extremely hormotional!), so everything coming at me is very overwhelming.
I was told there is never a right time to be confronted, I agree. I think for now it is best that I lay low. I've apologized and let them tell me how they feel about me. There is nothing more I can do. Just move on and keep going with life. I will dwell on it for a while and then hopefully just forget.
xoxo
We had a Mommy/Son date and we had a great time!
Today 08.01.2013 -
Hip hip hooray I am 17 weeks today! One week from today we will find out if we are having a boy or girl! That is if the baby cooperates and spreads the legs. Hahaha. I am super excited! Plus I cannot wait to find out how he or she is doing.
This past week has been pretty good and pretty blah. JJ turned 16 mos and hello week 17.
I've learned what family really thinks of me. One told me in a very mean way and another told me in a nice adult conversation. Either way I appreciate them for telling me and now I know what I am. I am not going to say it does not hurt. It does. The truth always hurts. All I can do is change for the better.
The one who I had a nice conversation with said that I am not used to going through these type of situations. I mean high school yah...but adulthood, nope. It is different as adults. I'd rather talk face to face as adults vs getting all the information whether it is through Facebook messages, texts or emails. I am happy this person actually sat down and told me face to face, even though it was via FaceTime. At least this person looked at me and told me straight up. It was much easier to take in.
I will cry about it, I will think about it and it will eat me up until it passes and has been forgotten.
I am owning up to it. I am sinner and I am not perfect. I make mistakes like every other human being. I am not better than anyone. I am me. I can and I will change for the better.
People's opinions of me should not matter, but it hurts. It will always hurt.
It makes it harder to deal with because I am pregnant (so my emotions and hormones are on high! I am extremely hormotional!), so everything coming at me is very overwhelming.
I was told there is never a right time to be confronted, I agree. I think for now it is best that I lay low. I've apologized and let them tell me how they feel about me. There is nothing more I can do. Just move on and keep going with life. I will dwell on it for a while and then hopefully just forget.
xoxo
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