Marriage and Pornography

This is an interesting topic. It came up in a conversation via text messages with a family member. I was told that it is funny that I got "worked up" over it, but I just wanted my family member to understand my point of view. But it was clearly stated by the end of the text conversation (by my family member) that I am "THAT insecure".

Here is my personal value/belief on the topic of pornography in marriage -

Everyone has insecurities and it is not funny to make fun of people because of them. Yes I have my insecurities, but they have nothing to do with me not wanting my husband to watch pornography.

When we got married I made it clear that I believe watching it individually is very disrespectful to me and to our marriage. Together, sure why not! But once you start watching it on your own for individual pleasure...it becomes disrespectful.

For some couples they enjoy it, I respect that. For others it is not okay. For my husband and I there is no pornography. I am the only woman that he should be thinking about and he is the only man for me. Hey if he wants some dirty pictures, I am more than happy to give him some (insert smile here) and vice versa. Our long distance marriage is tough and with technology today, sending each other videos and pics of each other keeps the spice alive.

So going back to what I was saying...

If my husband wanted to watch pornography then he should have not gotten married. I am blessed to have a husband that respects our marriage and respects me and my values. He has not watched any porn since we had our heart to heart. We are going on three years of being married. He is amazing. Yes, he is in Oregon and it is hard to know what goes on, but I trust him and have faith in him that he keeps his word. You just know with the one you love.

Because I do not want my husband to watch pornography DOES NOT make me "THAT insecure". It is OUR value in OUR marriage. We are committed to each other in love, trust and faithfulness.

No ones insecurities are greater than someone else's. An insecurity is an insecurity period. But it is NOT always the reason for a lot of situations. One being pornography and a significant other.

I posted in one of my Mom groups on Facebook about this conversation. The lovely mamas that did answer, believed in the same thing and some love watching it with their spouses. Every one has their own preferences. A lot of them said they are NOT insecure about themselves, they just believe porn is disrespectful in marriage. So, it is not just about being insecure.

What works for my husband and I may not work for another couple, but this works for US. We believe that it is not necessary to use in order to get it on behind closed (bedroom) doors.

xoxo